FOMO vs. JOMO; Why having an averagely boring marriage is a good thing

Apr 28, 2024

FOMO versus JOMO – Fear of Missing Out versus Joy of Missing Out.

Let's start with the basics: What exactly do I mean by an "average, really boring marriage"? Well, it's not about monotony or dullness, but rather about finding beauty in the simplicity, security, and stability that come with committed, long-term relationships.

Picture this: Predictability, continuity, and a deep sense of safety form the bedrock of your marriage. It's about knowing each other inside out, finishing each other's sentences, and having each other's backs through thick and thin. That's the magic of longevity and commitment.

But wait, that doesn't mean your marriage is devoid of excitement! No, no. It's about striking that perfect balance between familiarity and novelty. Whether it's trying out new restaurants, exploring different places, or spicing things up in the bedroom, there's always room for a little adventure.

Now, let's address the elephant in the room: the midlife crisis. You know, that moment when you suddenly find yourself questioning the routine of your daily life. It's natural to feel a twinge of FOMO, especially when you see your single friends living it up. But here's the thing – you can bring that excitement into your marriage too!

So, what does an average, really boring marriage look like in practice? For starters, it's drama-free. Sure, every couple has disagreements, but they're resolved calmly and respectfully. No personal attacks, no lingering tension – just healthy communication and mutual understanding.

Next up, let's talk about commitment versus personal fulfillment. In a boring marriage (trust me, it's not as bad as it sounds), commitment takes precedence over individual desires. It's about finding fulfillment in shared experiences rather than chasing solo adventures.

Of course, that doesn't mean you can't have your own interests and hobbies. It's all about finding a balance between independence and interdependence – where you cherish your connection with your partner while still nurturing your individuality.

Now, onto the practical stuff. How do you cultivate an average, really boring marriage? Here are three simple steps:

  • Choose Your Yeses Wisely: Don't spread ourselves too thin by saying yes to every social invitation that comes your way. Be discerning about how you spend your time, prioritizing quality time together over fleeting distractions.
  • Mind Your Comparisons: Avoid comparing your relationship to others, especially when it comes to unrealistic standards. Remember, every couple is unique, and what works for others may not work for you. Focus on nurturing your own bond instead of chasing someone else's idea of happiness.
  • Pick Your Advisors Wisely: Surround yourself with friends and mentors who uplift and support your relationship. Seek guidance from those who share your values and understand the importance of commitment and communication.

In conclusion, let's embrace the beauty of an average, boring marriage. Reject the allure of drama and intensity, and instead, revel in the comfort and stability of a loving partnership. Because true happiness isn't found in fleeting thrills, but in the deep, enduring connection we share with our soulmates.

So here's to building a marriage that's anything but average – filled with love, laughter, and a whole lot of joy. Until next time, stay blessed, stay connected, and keep spreading the love!

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